From A Dads Point of View. Part 3
Here is part 3 continuing from my previous blog:
(Recap) Let me preface this by saying. I took a long shot at this. My husband is a very vocal man and tells me sweet nothings here and there, however, my husband is not a writer. I never thought in a million years that he would write this for me, but I had to take a shot and ask him anyway!
I asked him to tell me his point of view from his time during me being pregnant and breastfeeding my son who was born in 2022.
Specifically:
What went through your mind when I told you I was pregnant?
How did you feel when you found out he was a boy?
What was going through your mind when I would randomly start crying? were you ready to run? lol
How did you feel or what were you thinking when you heard his heartbeat for the first time?
How was it for you caring for me while I was pregnant and taking on more responsibilites and working a full time job?
When it was getting closer to due date time, were you nervous?
When we went to the hospital to have a baby how was your stay? having to watch me go through being induced etc.
How did you feel when it was time to take our newborn home? were you nervous?
How was it staying home with a newborn, sleep deprived and going back to work?
When I left Luca for the first time on a trip to target and I called you crying, what was going through your mind?
When it was finally time to stop breastfeeding and a left to Vegas for 3 days, how did that go for you?
It was A LOT of questions and he gave me answers…
I am going to split this into parts because It is quite the read and I dont want overwhelm my readers.
So here we go:
The Day We Met Luca: A Birth Story
Moving up to the day we went to the hospital.
If I remember correctly, my wife was having some small contractions. We weren't sure if they were real or just Braxton Hicks. When we got to the hospital and the nurses and doctor checked her out, they said she was far along enough to be induced into labor if we chose to. We weren't sure, but they also said that she was already at 40 weeks, and the longer we waited, the more dangerous it could get, so we decided to move forward with her getting induced. I got excited as I was ready to see our baby boy, and I knew my wife was ready to get him out of there.
The Birth Process Begins
I can’t remember exactly how long it was from induction to birth, but I think it was about three hours or so. When the nurses finally came in and checked her again, they said, “Ohh, it’s baby time!” That’s when my nerves finally kicked in. I prayed in my head over and over for a healthy birth and a healthy baby. I’ve seen birth twice before with my other two, so I knew it was about to get rough for my wife. I just wanted it to be over as soon as possible for her. I also remember hearing the lady next door to us screaming for about 20 minutes as she went through a natural birth. That wasn’t the best noise for my wife to hear, I’m sure.
Meeting Our Baby Boy
Finally, the doctor came in and it was time for her to start pushing. I held her hand and kept trying to keep her mind in the right place, letting her know she could do it and to keep breathing and pushing. It couldn’t have been more than five minutes later, and out came a baby boy. My breathing stopped as he came out. As soon as he started his tiny little cry, I could breathe again. I turned right to my wife with overwhelming emotion and told her, “You did it,” with tears in my eyes. I was so proud of her. I’ll never forget that moment she gave birth to our precious little boy, Luca.
Hospital Life
After my emotions settled down, daddy mode kicked in and it was time to love my little boy. We both knew the drill: feeding, keeping track of feedings, changing diapers, keeping track of poops, and nurses coming in and out every 15 minutes, giving absolutely zero time for us to rest or have privacy. It’s funny because with my firstborn, I was so scared to leave the hospital, as it felt safe having the nurses help because I had no idea what I was doing. With Luca, I couldn’t wait to get the heck out of there. I’m not trying to take anything away from what my wife went through giving birth, but hospitals are notorious for creating the worst sleeping conditions for fathers in the history of sleeping conditions. I didn’t sleep for a minute the two nights we were in the hospital. I don’t think I slept for almost 72 hours after Luca was born, and I didn’t catch up on sleep for a couple of weeks. It was a very rough first couple of weeks, but my wife was there every step of the way, helping and eventually doing more than me, as she let me sleep and continued to breastfeed to try and build up her milk supply.
Back to Work Life
After a couple of weeks, I had to start working again, as I only had two weeks of PTO. I would roll out of bed straight into work calls, trying to keep my eyes open. I would do my best to be quiet so I didn’t wake the baby, which would, in turn, wake up my sleep-deprived wife as well. We quickly found out I had to move my work desk into the baby's room since he was sleeping in our master bedroom with us. I remember hearing the baby crying while I was working in the other room, and even though I was working, I still had to go get the baby so my wife could rest. She started doing the night shifts so that I could get enough rest to be functional and productive at work. I’m so grateful for my wife being the amazing mom and wife that she is. We both couldn’t have done it without the other.
Soaking in the Newborn Days
Although those first couple of weeks were rough, I remember not trying to rush them, as the newborn stage is so special. They are so helplessly adorable. Gives me baby fever just thinking about it. I remember the second week we were home, my wife was getting stir-crazy because she hadn’t left the house once. She decided she wanted to go to the store while I stayed home with the baby. She called me about 30 minutes later as she left the store, and she was crying because she was scared that she was so far away from the baby and said she should’ve never left. I just stayed on the phone with her as I had the baby in my arms, reaffirming that the baby was perfectly safe and happy in Daddy’s arms. I knew her emotions were still all over the place from pregnancy and birth, but it’s still something you have to watch and care for as a partner. It just comes with the territory.
More answers coming next week! Stay tuned for the last and final part, part 4…
